Manny Ramirez Ass Just Got Traded to the Dodgers

The Fall of Manny Ramirez
The Fall of Manny Ramirez

All hail the baseball gods for they have seen fit to respect my wishes. Mangina Ramirez is now officially an LA Dodger! Unfortunately the Red Sox will have to pay the remaining $7 mil of his bloated contract, but that price is well worth being rid of him once and for all. Let the Pirates deal with his options.

The Red Sox Get Jason Bay

Two-time All-Star slugger Jason Bay is coming to the Red Sox as part of the 3-way deal that will also send 4 minor leaguers to the the Pittsburgh Pirates. The Pirates also get Brandon Moss, which stinks because Moss seems like a decent outfield prospect, and Craig Hansen, who is a crappy bullpen pitcher that mostly plays in losing games or gives up a bunch of earned runs and loses the game anyway.


Welcome Jason Bay
Welcome Jason Bay

Jason Bay is a pretty good player, who has stats that are surprisingly similar to Manny’s. Of course Manny has put up some killer power numbers over the years, crushing 40 or more HRs 5 times and 130 or more RBIs 4 times; his career average is .312.

Bay never hit more than 35 HRs or 109 RBI in a season, with a career average of .281. On the other hand, Manfart is 36, while Bay is only 29. Bay has also been forced to play for the Patheticburgh Pirates his entire career (except for 8 at-bats with the Padres), which means that stepping into the Red Sox lineup could usher him into the permanent All-Star realm.

For more proof that the Red Sox got a fair deal, check out a stats comparison for just this year…

Jason Bay Manny Ramirez
At Bats 393 365
AVG .282 .299
HR 22 20
RBI 64 68
OBP .375 .398
SLG .515 .590

Their stats are also fairly similar last year, in which Manny had about 55 fewer at bats. I figure Manpuss will probably outproduce Bay by about 10% each season, although Bay just might improve with his new team and as he further matures in his 30s. Furthermore, the Devil Rays wanted Bay too, and since Tampa is inexplicably good this year, I find it satisfying that they didn’t get him.

Mangina Pitches a Fit

Every season for the last few years is seems that he throws a temper tantrum right around the trade deadline, or towards the end of the season. I’ve been hoping to see the blow-bag traded since 2006. Even still, it was Manboob’s recent tirade that probably sealed the deal, in which he commented:

“The Red Sox don’t deserve a player like me. During my years here, I’ve seen how they [the Red Sox] have mistreated other great players when they didn’t want them, to try to turn the fans against them.” Manny told an ESPN Deportes reporter on Wednesday, “The Red Sox did the same with guys like Nomar Garciaparra and Pedro Martinez, and now they do the same with me. Their goal is to paint me as the bad guy. I love Boston fans, but the Red Sox don’t deserve me. I’m not talking about money. Mental peace has no price, and I don’t have peace here.”

So that’s it. I will probably never blog about the big Mangina again. It’s just that I haven’t been this upset since Johnny “The Traitor” Damon joined forces with The Evil Empire. I was sad to see Nomar go, and Pedro was on his last legs anyway, but it was time for me to step up and voice my opinion about the Manny saga. After all, I have a blog so I can write whatever I want. =)

Yankees Suck!

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